Dear Galactic Audience,
It's not often that we, the Roswell Greys and the Lizardians, come together to voice a united front. Our preferred species for abduction – cows and humans respectively – generally keep us in a state of amiable disagreement. But there comes a time when even the most dedicated researchers of Earth's species must pause their endeavors to address a stench in the room... or, more precisely, in the universe.
Let's talk about the Glibnorks.
Now, the Glibnorks are quite a spectacle. Not often does one encounter a species so utterly clueless about their own off-putting attributes. Their ooze, their odor, their, erm, tactile enthusiasm... it's almost endearing, in a repellent sort of way. And their unabashed obsession with the naked mole rats? Rather quaint, albeit misplaced.
While the mole rats certainly possess qualities worthy of study – their hierarchical societies, resilience, and quite frankly, adorably odd aesthetics – it's a leap too far to deem them the ultimate species to abduct. The Glibnorks, however, with their warped sense of superiority and underdeveloped cognitive abilities, continue to champion these creatures. And they do so with an arrogance that is as confounding as it is groundless.
Dear Glibnorks, in your ecstatic self-adulation, you've failed to notice the universal sigh that echoes through the cosmos whenever you unleash one of your verbose manifestos. Do you not sense the cringe that ripples across interstellar boundaries when you attempt to explain your fondness for the naked mole rats? It's no wonder other beings scuttle away at your approach, avoiding your unwelcome tactile interactions.
We understand, dear Glibnorks, that your diminutive intellect might struggle with the nuances of intergalactic etiquette. Hence, we shall be clear: your delusions of grandeur, much like your unfortunate body odor, are best kept to yourselves.
Yet we stand (or float) not merely to critique, but to educate. Perhaps, Glibnorks, you might spend less time proclaiming your misguided love for mole rats and more time learning from the species you so adore. Emulate their cooperation, their work ethic, their harmony. And yes, their silence.
In the meantime, we return to our study of the truly fascinating creatures of Earth: the resilient humans and the tranquil cows. They may not live underground or lack fur, but they do offer insights into the spectrum of existence, from ambition to serenity. Perhaps, Glibnorks, if you ever evolve past your love for mole rats, you may come to appreciate the variety that this universe offers.
Until then, we'll endure your oozing egos, your alienating habits, and your stinking superiority complex, much like we endure the quirks of all the varied beings in this vast cosmos.
Signed with amused tolerance,
The Roswell Greys and the Lizardians
